Title: Wishing on a Blue Star
Authors: Various, edited by Kris Jacen
Publisher: Dreamspinner Press
Genre: Contemporary M/M
Length: 401 pages
Rating: 5+ stars out of 5, DIK
Summary: One man’s incredibly painful journey that inspired us all.
THE BLURB
Special Project by Dreamspinner Press & ManLoveRomance Press. Edited by Kris Jacen.
How much impact can someone have on your life if you’ve never met them face to face?
In this electronic age of E-mails, electronic publishing, and social networks, quite a lot.
Through his emails, stories and blog, author Patric Michael has touched numerous hearts, minds and lives from the start of his career and further as he now takes us along on his journey to battle cancer.
Along the way, Patric shows us a side of life that not many truly see– how we are all a part of something larger than just ourselves, and how we are each touched by others for the betterment of all.
Now, those that have been touched by Patric and his words have joined together to give something back, to him and to us all through something he values highly – words.
In this compilation, gay short stories, poems, and anecdotes combined with excerpts from Patric’s blog and a few entertaining, educational group posts reveal, and celebrate, the man who has touched so many hearts and minds.
This collection, sometimes erotic, sometimes irreverent, and always poignant, is a gift from all our hearts to celebrate Patric and give strength (and a little levity) to others. The price reflects this; no one is receiving royalties or payment from the sales. Use it to celebrate life, celebrate words, and possibly inspire someone who needs it.
THE REVIEW
Patric’s Blogs
I knew that this anthology would be difficult to read but I never realized how engaged my emotions would be as Patric’s blog posts turned my feelings inside out and broke my heart, even though I had read some of them before. I’ll do this in two parts. The first is Patric’s journey so far in his battle with a rare form of cancer, which is detailed in a series of online journals that touched everyone who read them, most of whom he has never met face to face. The impact that this one remarkable man has had on all of us who *know* him is profound. He is a writer like so many others, but the amazing thing about Patric is his ability to crawl inside your heart and stay there. That one man influenced so many others to think about someone other than themselves is what’s so amazing, and the fact that other authors did something to remember him in a way he would appreciate – words – is fitting for someone as creative as Patric.
The depth of Patric’s courage is unbelievable and his daily struggle to live with cancer, while coping with the treatments which were almost as bad as and in some cases worse than the disease, made me realize how cancer destroys someone’s spirit and and turns the brain into mush.
Having read this journal I now regard people suffering from cancer and other life threatening diseases differently, because if they had to endure one quarter of what Patric detailed in his blog posts I take my hat off to all of them. Patric’s blogs are interspersed with the stories by his author friends, his tone at times warm and comforting, but ofttimes prickly when things got really rough for him and he let his emotions show. This only proved that he was no superman but a regular person like the rest of us, the only difference being that he was fighting to live with a deadly disease that made him so much more vulnerable. He was courageous when most of us would have curled up and died, literally, and he gave new meaning to the words “endure with dignity.”
I don’t mean to overly stress Patric’s courage or make him out to be a saint because he sure isn’t a saint, in fact he’s all too human. But his journey over the past year has been so horrendous I wondered how he could have remained sane, and why his spirit was not broken. You probably would not be able to read Patric’s journal all at once because it’s much too painful, unless you have had personal experience with a similar fight and his journey gives you hope. His fight will never be over as any cancer survivor will tell you, and we can only imagine what it is like living this, rather than reading about it. I admire Patric’s determination to live despite incredible odds and downsides – the disease; the treatments; the drugs that didn’t work; the indignities; the service providers who didn’t provide any service; the cold insurance companies who refused to fund much needed drugs; the system; the “establishment;” and the personal challenges, many of which he recounted. Of course he also talked about what it’s like to be terminal – something none of us wants to face – the effect this has had on family and friends, and how difficult it was at times to be invisible to others.
These blog posts make me thankful, selfishly, for my own life. Patric’s humour and dignity among the wreckage of what his life had become, show the kind of man he always was, but it took something as devastating as a life threatening disease for us to realize what a great person he is. We know now that Patric didn’t expect to be here when this anthology was published because his form of cancer has an almost nil survivability rate. He wrote the blogs in the hope that they would help others suffering from the disease; the fact that he’s still here and hopes to continue to enjoy good health, for which we’re all thankful, is a huge bonus.
I hope that you will read about Patric’s fight and come away a better person. There is no “do over” in life, but while this may be Patric’s fight it’s a lesson to all of us about what is really important.
Elizabeth North said about Patric in her Afterword to Wishing on a Blue Star – His wish was that others fighting cancer and their families might find help, comfort and understanding through his shared experiences. He wanted to offer what we all long for—a chance to connect with someone else with similar views, feelings and experiences and to be really understood. He hoped with words to achieve that moment of “here is someone like me, someone who has felt the way I do.”
The Stories
This anthology contains stories, poems and personal tributes from ZA Maxfield, Mary Calmes, Jaime Samms, Lex Valentine, Victor J. Banis, Brian Holliday, Jambrea Jo Jones, Amy Lane, Tame Adams, Karenna Colcroft, Jan Irving, Jean Lorrah, Chrissy Munder, Taylor Lochland, D.W. Marchwell, Clare London, Moira McCain, C. Zampa, and Jacqueline Litchenberg. Because there were so many stories in the anthology I could not possibly review them all, but I will try to give you an idea of which ones stood out for me and provide short reviews of those that most impressed or touched me. Many of the stories did not end in a HEA, although they were uplifting. One in particular is what I would call a 5 hankie story. Patric Michael also contributed two posts which will make you appreciate what a terrific writer he is and how funny he can be. You will gain a new respect for this man who, in the middle of his crisis, was able to compose stories such as the one about the Prostate and another one about Sounds which made me laugh because they were so cool as well as being laugh out loud funny.
When Angels Fall by Z.A. Maxfield – paranormal M/M
Kipling Rush fell into an abandoned mine when he was in grade 5 and that’s when he met Chemuel, who broke his fall. Kip thought the name Chemuel was strange so he renamed him and Chemuel became ‘Crash.’ Kip and Crash spent every waking moment together after they were rescued, and Kip assumed that Crash was home-schooled because he didn’t go to school and didn’t seem to know anything about what most teenagers would consider ‘normal’, like Oreo cookies. He also never talked about himself, but he sure was pretty.
As a junior in college Crash was still Kip’s best friend but Kip had fallen in love with him. Kip thought Crash was asexual because he didn’t seem to have normal sexual urges, and as he didn’t think that his love could ever be returned he went clubbing for hookups until one night he was almost raped, and again Crash saved him. That was when Crash kissed him and Kip realized that he felt the same urges he did, although Crash seemed innocent about sex. When they took off each other’s clothes later Kip saw that Crash’s back was horribly burned, which explained why he never went swimming or took off his shirt before, but he didn’t want to talk about how he came by his scars. At times we get glimpses of Crash’s thoughts, and he told Kip one thing which he never understood until it was necessary for him to do so “I am yours… wherever you go I will follow.” When Kip left school he and Crash lived together and to all intents and purposes their relationship was the same as other couples who were in love, but was it? Crash always knew what Kip was going to say and seemed to be able to read his mind.
Once again Z.A. Maxfield has written a wonderful love story and you will fall in love with Kip and Crash, both of whom were three dimensional, although it took almost the end of the story to figure out Crash.
The ending of When Angels Fall is different from most romances but I thought it was fitting.
In The Light – A Five Dark Realms Tale by Lex Valentine
Weylin is a werewolf and his lover Drake Keating is a wizard. They had been close friends for years and lived together as lovers even though they were not mates. Wey was a musician so he normally slept during the day, but it was afternoon and he was wide awake. He had a sense of foreboding then his heart started beating irregularly and his eyes glowed, a sure sign that something was very wrong. Drake who was never concerned about anything was also alarmed, and while they were trying to figure out what the problem was Wey’s cell phone rang and it was his best friend Grant, which was also strange because Grant knew that he was never awake during the day. Turns out Grant wanted to see him, which in itself was not surprising but the location was unsettling to Wey because Grant asked him to drop by In The Light, a bar in the Shadoworld, in the Five Dark Realms, an area he never liked due to the types of people who hung out there. The only beings he knew personally who lived in the Shadoworld which existed on a plane between the Darkworld and the Afterworld were the Fallen Angels.
Of course Wey went to see Grant. He went through the portal into the Shadoworld and Grant was sitting in the bar with a drink, eating peanuts as he always had done when they were together. As they chatted the conversation seemed stilted and he couldn’t figure out what was wrong. Grant was the same, yet he wasn’t, and while everything seemed normal some of his mannerisms were different and he was in considerable pain, which begged the question – why hadn’t he shifted since this would have eliminated the pain? They started going over their lives together and talking about the important highlights and asking questions that neither thought of asking before. Did Wey have some sort of premonition?
This story was another one that I enjoyed a lot, because although it was sad, dark and sombre and at times it was like someone had walked over a grave, it was also funny as Grant and Wey laughed about their sexual escapades with the Fallen Angels and other beings.
The point that Wey had always impressed on his friend was to do the right thing as Grant reminded him, and although that may not always have the fairest outcome it was the only thing that any man with a conscience could do, and Grant followed that advice to the letter.
I think if you enjoy paranormal stories you will definitely like this one.
The Lost Ones by Victor J Banis
This story was different from the others because it was not a love story. Trevor Harding was 91 and he was dying in a nursing home. He had no one left. All of his friends had passed on and the only other persion in his life, his son Jamie, had committed suicide when he was a teenager all those years ago due to being bullied at his school. Trevor still felt guilty that he had not supported Jamie or comforted him during that time. He hadn’t wanted to know that his son was gay, and therefore never discussed his sexual orientation with him, even though he knew how upset he was about being bullied. He blamed himself for Jamie’s death and never got over his suicide but used the rest of his life to make amends by donating his money to help other teenagers in similar situations. Now he was coming to the end of his life and he still could not get over the waste of Jamie’s life.
Living in the nursing home was, as expected, boring for Trevor. The rooms were bare, and every day was like the one before with nothing to look forward to. One morning he woke up at 4.00 A.M. realizing that he had a visitor, the first one he had had in years, who told him that he had been dreaming. His visitor said that he frequently volunteered at the nursing home and came into Trevor’s room because he thought he was awake. He then talked to him about Jamie. But was it a dream?
I liked this story because it was so poignant, and as always Victor Banis is a great storyteller.
Linchpin by Mary Calmes
This is another of my favourite stories in the anthology. Mark Gabriel had always been the family caretaker and keeper of secrets for his siblings whom he had rescued from many scrapes and brushes with the law. He was the eldest and everyone always looked to him to take care of them. Now there was another crisis in the family involving his youngest brother Frank who his parents and siblings wanted to have committed because he had recently overdosed. They all converged on Mark’s and his partner Tai’s home to convince Mark to allow them to commit Frank who was currently staying with him and Tai. Of course, he defended his brother by pointing to the others’ misdeeds when he saved their bacon, and made the point that Frank deserved his chance.
Mark did not consider himself attractive. He had met the much sought after Tai 16 years ago at a party where all the other single gay men were after him. Tai was a pilot, extremely attractive, and never had anything other than one night stands. When they met Mark knew he could not afford to be another notch on Tai’s belt if he wanted to be important to him and different from the others who had gone before him. He devised a strategy of wooing Tai and not having sex with him for a month, until both of them were going crazy but it worked and now, almost 2 decades later they were even more in love and Tai could not bear to be away from Mark more than was absolutely necessary. However a crisis of immense proportions was going to hit the family. Would they be able to cope? How was Tai going to weather this storm?
This very heartfelt story was well written with two three dimensional protagonists and even the secondary characters were well drawn. I loved both Tai and Mark and I thought that the subject matter was dealt with in a way that while it was sad, it also proved that there was such a thing as abiding love.
Dreams of Terrible Brightness by Amy Lane
This is perhaps the most harrowing story in the entire anthology and the one to which I referred as a 5 hankie tale.
Connor was in the last stage of his life and every gasp could very well be his last. His boyfriend Jimmy with whom Connor had been together for 5 years, was inconsolable. Just one year after being diagnosed with cancer he was one step away from the afterworld. He was only waiting for his mother whom he loved, to arrive, so that he could say goodbye.
Connor’s only relief was the morphine which brought relief but also dreams of terrible brightness. He didn’t want to spend what was left of his life in the clouds, not recognizing anyone especially Jimmy. His last desire was to be with Jimmy every waking moment. Jimmy was now working from home in order to care for Connor who could no longer take care of himself. Connor had once been a burly construction worker and now he had wasted away to skin and bone, but Jimmy still adored him. When they first met Jimmy wasn’t sure he wanted to settle down and Connor let him have his flings until he decided that he wanted to be with him, and that was the way it had been for most of their lives together. Now it was Connor who was leaving.
You need to take a very deep breath, maybe several deep breaths, to read Dreams of Terrible Brightness because there is no upside to this story except for the fact that Connor’s mother and Jimmy found comfort in each other while trying to live without him. In a way this was a love story because Connor and Jimmy definitely loved each other but love couldn’t keep them together.
I don’t know how Amy Lane does it but it seems that she has a knack for reaching right inside you and pulling your heart out.
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I coudn’t review all of the other wonderful stories and poems or this review would have been almost as long as the anthology which is 401 pages. Every story and poem had a powerful message, from Clare London’s beautiful tale The Better Part about Charlie the dweeb who loved to challenge even the biggest school bully and was only saved by his lifelong friend Adam who looked out for him, to all those other stories that time will not permit me to review such as Taylor Lochland’s A Place to Belong. Every story was moving and a fitting tribute to the man who inspired them.
You should all get this anthology which is available free if you want the ebook or $7 for the print copy if you buy it from Dreamspinner. It’s a wonderful but poignant slice of life.
Just got my copy and I can’t wait to sit down and start reading….and I am SO thankful that we are able to read it and know that Patric is WELL.
Elaine
that’s the best part because this could have all gone terribly wrong. We’re all thankful that Patric is still with us. You will love his story Is the Prostate Worth Finding. lol.
This is one book I don’t have to read (although I will) to know the most important thing about it – that it was labor of love and respect. I think that’s more than enough. But, I’m still glad it got the glowing review. Thanks! ^^
Hi Lady M
This book was definitely a labour of love and respect for someone who is held in high regard. We don’t see a lot of that goung around. I hope you enjoy the stories and Patric’s journal. Just make sure that you have a box of tissues handy and two more for Amy’s story.
Oh, Wave. Thank you.
Lex
I always enjoy your stories – I just wish you would write more M/M but that’s another day. I really enjoyed Wey, Drake and most of all Grant. 🙂
I have one coming for you. Breathe Me In is Tales book 6.5. Hot cover. Hot men. All gay.
email me please when the book is released. 🙂 I’ll look forward to it.
I’ll send you a copy of Will and Garrick as soon as it’s out.
Thanks Wave, for sharing your thoughts. You can’t know the outpouring of love that created this book; people just gave everything they had. I’m so privileged to have been a part of it.
ZAM
The love came through loud and clear. I always respected Patric’s talent but now I have another reason to love the man.
BTW I really adored Kip and Crash, especially Crash. 🙂
*sorry Wave* I guess I owe you whiskey and cookies now…
Amy
I used up two boxes of tissues on your story alone. My eyes are two red balls in my face. Now I’m off to read Patric’s prostate post all over again to try and be happy. 🙂
You need to send me two bottles of hard liquor to make up for Dreams of Terrible Brightness and Talker’s Redemption. 🙁
Wave, I was crying before when I read your post about Patric, because I also lost close family member to cancer and I am almost crying now. I am definitely getting this anthology simply because I know that Patric is getting his happy ending and hopefully for many many years to come.
Sirius
This was a tough anthology for me to read and it took me almost a week and then all of today and part of this evening to write the review.
Losing a close family member to this horrible disease will make you appreciate what he or she went through, although I’m sure it was probably not as harrowing as Patric’s journey. The stories are enjoyable but I think you need to read Patric’s journal over several weeks or months as we did on his blog.
I just downloaded my copy and I’ll be able to buy a print copy soon. Thanks for such a memorable and heartfelt review, Wave — as well as the post last week 🙂
This was my toughest review so far Cole. It took me a week to read all of Patric’s posts although I had read some of them over the past year. The stories were all wonderful. I’m only sorry I was able to review just a few of them. I hope you do read the anthology – it’s well worth it.
Oh, this book is just SO good. And Wave, see what I mean about the Amy Lane story?! Just too beautifully wretched.
Kel
She IS wretched. lol.
The anthology is filled with memorable stories, including Amy’s, and I’m only sorry I could not review them all. I had to pick 5 because of space and time, or I would still be writing this review today. 🙂
I have such mixed feelings about this anthology. And not because of the stories (I didn’t read it yet) but because of its original purpose.
I know it was intended to pay homage to an wonderful man, I know that putting together an anthology takes time, I know it’s better to be prepared for any eventuality but at the time they started it, Patric was still alive. Is true that the things didn’t look good for Patric but it seems to me that even his friends had lost hope.
I’m sure the result is wonderful and it would have been a huge waste to not publish this anthology but I can’t stop feeling that this whole situation is a little creepy. “Look, this is the book they would have published if I had died.” (I hate English past tenses)
Maybe I’m a bitch, maybe I’m narrow minded, maybe I presume too much, maybe I put my foot in my mouth but this is what I think. Even if I don’t have enough words to say it. English words, that is.
Please, Wave and the rest of you, don’t shoot me.
Hi Alina
I understand your reservations but Patric was part of this project because at the time he had no hope of even making it to this month, never mind today. If you read his journals you will understand.
When his friends realized that Patric’s situation was indeed dire, and that the chances that he would be with us for much longer were slim and nil, they asked him how he would like to be remembered.
Part of the reason for his online journal was to help other cancer sufferers, and in the end I think it served its purpose because if his case, which is very rare given the type of cancer he has (it has a low survivability rate) has a hopeful ending, then there’s a chance for every other cancer victim.
I hope you will read the book which is free if you get the ebook from Dreamspinner and perhaps it will give you a greater understanding.
This is now a celebration and not a memorial, and for that we are all thankful.
No one will ever shoot you here 🙂 and I quite understand your point because initially I felt some of your concern.
BTW Alina, Patric only found out as recently as a few weeks ago that he had a second chance at living a little longer, and the anthology was not finished until a few days ago – so the planning was not that long in the making. It only went into high gear when Patric mentioned that the fight was just about over. 🙁
Believe me, Wave, I know about Patric’s journal. In the last several months I checked it almost every day but I refused to believe, or think, that won’t be a happy ending. The day he told us that he won the battle I cried buckets.
Anyway, this doesn’t matter anymore. Two things are now important – Patric is alive and the anthology is published.
Alina
I’m hoping that other cancer sufferers will take heart and maybe have a bit of hope from reading the anthology because all of Patric’s journals to date are now in one place. Patric has said on numerous occasions, there is no cure and every day is still a struggle. Cancer is so insidious it can recur unexpectedly in another location and we’re all hoping this will not happen.
As you said – Patric is alive when no one expected him to be; the anthology is published and he is here to read it. 🙂
Hi Alina…
My apologies for not replying sooner, but as Wave mentioned, technical difficulties got the better of me, temporarily. 🙂
I appreciate your candor in expressing your sentiments about the book, and especially about the introduction. If you’ve finished reading my parts of the book, you’ll know how much I value candor, and honesty. 🙂
You were right, you know. The intro *was* written as though I were already gone. Not because anyone lost hope, but because no one expected me to survive. I certainly didn’t, so when Kris gave me the rough draft she had written, I didn’t see “creepy.” Instead, I saw love and friendship expressed in the sadness she felt. I also saw joy.
To me, the real gift in this book is that I got to see what people thought about our time together while I was still around to appreciate it. It was an unusual opportunity, I grant you. I could even say it was a little strange, but how could I possibly see anything other than joy when I know that Kris and the others wrote from their hearts?
Call me biased, deluded, or even blind, but as far as I am concerned, I am the luckiest guy alive. I have friends who were willing to share their love with others, and I have more time to love them in return.
Patric
I’m late but I just got off work and the time change is horrendous! Thank you for your wonderful review of the anthology Wave, just like ZAM, I was honored to be a part of this project.
You’re quite welcome Mary. I just want to say again how much I enjoyed Mark’s and Tai’s story, which I think was one of the highlights of the anthology.
Patric was unable to comment because he could not win the battle against our new spam filter even if he is able to fight cancer, 🙂 so he sent me his comment for inclusion here —
“Wave…
I’ve said it so many times, to so many people that it’s attenuated to the point of invisibility, but thank you, yet again.
Kris did an amazing job putting together such a diverse range of stories and I am delighted you found the result so pleasing. Everyone who participated, and there are so many names that as you said, it would be a list as long as the book itself to compile, all deserve a rich round of applause.
It goes without saying that you are a part of that list, Wave. You have no idea how much I appreciate your objectivity. It makes your reviews all the more valuable, and your regard for Wishing all the more meaningful.
Thank you!
Patric”
Hey Patric
Thank you for the kind words, but I don’t feel that I did anything significant. I just wrote what I felt.
Your online journal and the anthology are illuminating, and everyone involved with this project did an outstanding job. The anthology now has a new purpose of showing that we can all beat a determined foe, even if it’s only for a while.
Thank you for being you Patric. Now I have to figure out a way to reprint that post on the prostate. lol. You are such a perv. 🙂
I hope that fate treats you well the rest of your life.
*Hugs*
Wave
I can’t wait to read this. But, I’m going to wait for the weekend, locked in my room, with lots of kleenex and chocolate. Patric has my utmost respect. I know that if the cancer doesn’t do you in, it’s entirely possible that the treatment will. Thanks for the review.
Hi Marilyn
You will need the Kleenex for a lot of the stories but especially for Amy’s.
As for Patric’s journals, they are special and you’re right to wait until you have the time to read them uninterrupted.
I’m a Brit, remember, and not one of those *huggy* people?! But this is quite a moment :):)
This was such an emotionally moving project to be involved in – but in a very uplifting way. There was plenty of fun and laughter and wit involved too *lol*. I’m so glad it’s come together, and I hope readers find it a treat.
Lovely review, Wave, and very glad you enjoyed Chas :).
Hi Clare
You’re right, this is quite a moment for all of us who love Patric and a really positive time. We don’t get many of these.
I did enjoy Chas and loved the story. 🙂
I can only imagine how hard this was to review Wave. Thank you and beautifully done. I will be getting the anthology and crying my eyes out I’m sure. But it’s good to experience all emotions, even the tougher ones. It affirms that we’re alive! And I’m very pleased to know that Patric is doing so well now.
Hi Tj
I hope you enjoy the book.
BTW this is not a tweet or pamphlet – I hope you noticed that it’s 401 pages. lol.
Yes, I noticed! I’m still waiting for that tweeted book series! LOL
Wave,
Thank you for such a heartfelt review. It seems that all we set out to do with the anthology (except memorialize Patric, thank goodness), is accomplished.
It was a difficult one to work on but I am ever so glad that I was asked to help out.
Hi Kris
I think everyone who was involved in this anthology should be proud. All the stories were memorable and appropriate and I loved Patric’s fun contributions. 🙂 Of course the journals were heartbreaking, but that was to be expected.
Great job on editing the anthology.
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I have a confession. Today, I fell a little bit in love with Patric Michael. Oh my. And I’m feeling grateful that’s he’s still around. I always hated when someone told me they admired my courage when dealing with cancer. I didn’t feel courageous. I just did what I had to do. Looking at it from an outside perspective, maybe I was courageous, because I sure see Patric’s courage in those blog posts. I just can’t seem to stop the leaky eyes. 🙂 What a wonderful tribute!
Hello Marilyn
I think we’re all in love with Patric because we have come to know the person as well as the author through his journals. His fight is very courageous because his cancer is particularly vicious, but I have a high regard for you and others like you who suffer from this disease.
I hope that you are in remission and that you will continue to enjoy good health.
Thank you Wave. I am happy to say, I am 19 months clear. I met a woman in the Dr’s office who had 12 years behind her. That is what I aspire to, and wish for Patric, as well.
Marilyn
I’m so happy for you and I pray that you will achieve your 12 year goal, and even longer 🙂 That is our hope for Patric as well.
Marilyn!
Congratulations! Nineteen months is an achievement I can well appreciate. 🙂
Thank you for your comment about courage. I am glad to know I’m not the only one to feel as you did.
Cheers!
Patric
Yay! I can comment again! (Christian, you rock!)
Just in time to thank everyone for their sentiments, both pro and con. 🙂
The subject is not something we generally find easy to deal with, and I commend you all for taking the time to express your thoughts and feelings.
I have to say that by the remarks everyone here has made thus far, it seems clear that folks understood the spirit and the ideas this particular anthology represents. Not only to say goodbye, (sorry if that sounds gruesome but I’ve always been wholly realistic about my situation) but to say “Hooray” too. Not only for me, but for anyone else who struggles with cancer, whether they have it or know someone who does.
Unless you’ve been there (gods forbid!) one simply cannot grasp *all* of the ramifications that dealing with a terminal disease entails, and by putting this project together we hope that others like me would know they weren’t alone, and that their family and friends might gain a better understanding of what we think and feel on the inside, where it is often hardest to speak.
Thanks again for all your comments, and for passing the book on to anyone else who might find value in the love, generosity, and support that is possible when good friends and total strangers come together for a common goal.
Patric
I have read and re read this anthology and i so want to convince my heart and head that it is a work of fiction…such beautiful writting, Patric doesnt blog anymore i am even afraid to ask , is he still with us?
Hi Deebi…
The writing is beautiful, isn’t it? The authors who contributed to the project are all wonderfully talented. Not to mention generous, thoughtful, compassionate, and about a billion other adjectives.
As you can see, I’m still here, the fact of which still has the power to surprise me.
Every time things get dicey, my brilliant, overworked, incredibly awesome doctor keeps pulling my butt out of the fire. 🙂
As for not blogging anymore, it’s mostly because I spend my time trying to find my place in this strange new world. (That, and I couldn’t think of anything interesting to say.) 😕
Thank you for asking, Deebi, and thank you for reading the book. I am pleased to know it is still moving around in the world. Feel free to pass it on. Even if you don’t know anyone who can relate to it directly, the stories are still wonderful, as are the people who wrote them.
Cheers!
Patric
Patric,
Thank you so much, for Staying alive:-)
I work for MD Anderson Cancer Center and Cancer is part of my every day life. Some days are good some are unbearable and yet i am just a voice of support. I received the Anthology through a patient who passed 2 weeks ago. She was 78 years old who loved to read and it has touched my heart in ways that are impossible to explain.
Thank you And please write some more
Deebi…
You are more than welcome! Laugh.
I have only the barest hint of what it must be like for you to work there, and that only gleaned from the nurses and doctors I meet at my own cancer center. I was so stunned and impressed by my first visit there that I could easily consider spending the last days under their care rather than hospice without much convincing. It takes a certain kind of person to deal with what you deal with every day, and let me thank and applaud you for doing it.
I’m sorry to hear that she passed, but I am glad she was able to pass the book on to you. It is comments like yours that make the whole thing, and the reason I wrote the blog in the first place, so very worthwhile.
Thank YOU!!
Patric
Patric,
I have learned to be part of a patient’s life and treat them in the most normal way possible. When it comes to their families and coping then I break down. You meet these strangers and they stop being strangers and become these wonderful people in your life. I worry everyday if I don’t hear from a patient or their family and I want to call and find out what is going on and how they are coping.
So wishing on a blue star should be an everyday mantra for someone like me because I am blessed to connect with strangers and get to love them and be heart broken when they go without saying good bye.
So do check in with the universe once in a while:-)
PS: I get ripped a new one almost every day by patients:-) Sometimes I deserve it sometimes they are just medicated and cranky 🙂 I love my job
Cheers
Deebi